When it comes to love and relationships, the media often tells us how to ‘reignite the spark’ in a stagnating relationship and fall in love all over again. But what about the most important relationship of all – the one with ourselves?
If you think you might have fallen out of love with yourself (signs: critical self-talk, not taking the time to nurture yourself), it might be time to look inward.
When we start recognising our own self-worth and being kinder to ourselves, you’ll find that, magically, love will come into your life in myriad ways.
So, this Valentine’s Day, as well as celebrating love for other people (whether it’s a partner or best friend), why not shower yourself with love – and treat yourself to all the beautiful things you deserve? Here are a few things you could try.
Find your lovers’ high
If you’ve ever fallen in love, you’ll remember those exciting, dizzying, intense, passion-filled highs of the first few months. Now apply this feeling to your own life: what passions do you have that make you feel this way? Is it singing, painting, life coaching, writing, exercise, animals? What makes you truly feel alive? If you’re struggling, sit down, open a beautiful notebook (one of our designer journals may inspire you), pour a cup of tea, and jot down what you dreamed of becoming when you were little. Once you discover what your passion is, do more of it. It doesn’t have to be a career change – it could simply be injecting more of what you love into your life every week.
You don’t have to send yourself a dozen red roses (although – why not?!) – this is simply about reminding yourself how special you are. Write a love letter to yourself on some beautiful DIY paper and make a list of your strengths, or nice things other people have said about you. Try asking your partner, mum or friend what they love about you. Keep it in your purse, and when you find yourself being self-critical, take it out and read it.
Spoil yourself rotten
Often we spoil others before ourselves, which makes us feel good. But how often do you treat yourself, and indulge in the things that make you truly happy? Whether it’s running a bubble bath, taking some out to appreciate a soul-lifting cup of tea in luxurious fine china (I find it very healing to drink tea before I go to bed), meditating 10 minutes a day, indulging in beautiful stationery or having a massage once a fortnight – schedule some non-negotiable time in your diary to nurture yourself.
Forgive and forget
Love is all about forgiveness. We are the hardest on ourselves – so instead of harbouring guilt or anger, let it go. What can you forgive yourself for today? Talk to yourself like you would a good friend … then turn a fresh page. You may not be perfect, but true love never is.
Happy Valentine’s Day.